夫妻爆笑,男受欺负,女受诋损

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1、从小体弱瘦小,在外总是受欺负。长大娶了个作风硬朗的媳妇后,内心倍感欣慰:妈妈再也不用担心我在外受欺负了。。。我TM现在只在家里受欺负。

2、老婆问我:如果有下辈子,你想要个女儿还是儿子?
我想到学习很差还爱打架的熊儿子,毫不犹豫的说:想要女儿。
啪,老婆打了我一嘴巴说道:你TM还想在这辈子找个情人是不是。。。
我。。。

3、问老公:“要是有狐狸精缠着你怎么办?”
他站起来,手把腰一掐,指着空气说:“你别在我面前这得瑟,离我远点。狐狸精,我告诉你,我老婆是猪精,可强壮呢,你打不过她的。”
听完我一脸黑线。

4、老婆:“你咋把我脸拍这么大!”
老公:“不是你说要拍近景?”
老婆:“笨蛋,那来张远的吧。”
老公:“拍好了。”
老婆:“让你拍我和花海,你咋拍得像我蹲在花海里拉屎?!!”
老公:“唉,谁让你脸大个子矮,我也木有办法啊!”

5、这几天放假,逛街顺便买了搓衣板和鸡毛掸子,本想好好收拾一下卫生,可老公却听话的不得了。。。

6、老李外出打工,他媳妇就在门前种了一棵松树。
几年后,他回来了,看了这棵树,说:这树长得挺好的。
他媳妇:是啊,四季常绿呢。

27 Responses to 夫妻爆笑,男受欺负,女受诋损

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